HONESTY TALK

 NOVEMBER 23, 2022

James 5:16

Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.

Stephen Blandino wrote, “People are messed up. I’m messed up, you’re messed up, and we all have problems. If you don’t think you have a problem…that’s your problem.” When I read that quote it made me smile by its truth.

I find, maybe you do too, that I/we often don’t get very real in relationships. Keeping people at an arm’s length distance because we don’t want them to see the real us; the parts of us that are still unattractive and need a lot of work. I think we entertain the thought and to a certain extent we believe that if they saw who we really are, they might disappear from our lives and remove us from their lives.

The reason I liked Blandino’s quote above is that an honest evaluation of ourselves and others results in the acknowledgement that we all have issues. If we think we are free from problems or issues, that is our problem or issue. This is why we all need a community; we need to have that safe someone or group with whom we can be honest. That is the essence of community.

Generally, when we finally get to the place of sharing a struggle with a friend, often we are met with a compassionate, understanding response. It’s amazing how vulnerability breeds more vulnerability. I know for myself one of the barriers I am working to overcome is the anticipation that a persons reaction will be judgmental. I/We have got to let those notions go. We all have something we need to share and “get off our chests” as we say.

Recent Order of Canada recipient Séan McCann is perhaps best known for singing and playing energetic rock melodies inspired by traditional Newfoundland folk songs in the band, Great Big Sea. A man recovering from alcoholism and childhood trauma at the hands of a Priest posted these words a while ago: “There’s only one thing that can defeat a secret and that is sharing it.”

So, who do we open our lives up to?

People who have proven to be trustworthy, who are grounded in life, and grounded in the Word of God is a real plus, and who will keep our confidence. Transparency and honesty is reserved for a select few. When we are struggling, we may choose to go into greater detail with those who have earned the privilege of sharing and bearing our burdens.

James 5:16 says that if we want healing and freedom from those sins and experiences that trip us up, sharing with others lifts the burden w carry.

“Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.”

Opening our hearts to a trusted soul mate and close friend brings not only a sense of relief and freedom but also an opportunity to receive compassion and wisdom. Community lifts us out of our loneliness and into freedom.